Training Plans

If there's one thing I can say LO has taught me, it'd have to be that, as much as I like to try, there's little use to planning where he is concerned.  Sure, we are lovers of structure and routine, but plans are all together different.  Despite having learned this lesson intellectually, I often forget it practically.  While I am better at being flexible with him, that only goes so far before it wrecks my (plans for the) day.

Enter the timely issue of potty training/learning.  Sure, I know the signs, I'm familiar with several approaches, I have a couple of favorite theories, and I planned to work all of that out after Newbie was here and a little settled.  LO really hadn't shown much interest, and he pretty much exclusively poops during nap time, so there was no rush for his side.  We read books, we had a couple of potties, we talked about undies, we giggled about "pee," "poop," and "undies" a lot.  (LO, what should we name your baby brother? Pee!...poor Newbie doesn't stand a chance)  LO had put in his request that his undies be orange boxers when he finally earned them.  Those, by the way, are not available on any undies' aisle in our town.  As a result, I have been on an undies hunt for about a month so we could have some when the time came.

Well, I bought some training undies last weekend (some with orange stripes and orange dinosaurs) last weekend during a "we're not going to Target for six months, so tell me now if you're going to need it" trip. (DH incidentally is at Target now...apparently 6 months is more like 7 days) I can't remember if I showed LO the undies or not, but on Wednesday, just before we needed to leave for Kindermusik, he asked to use the potty. Thirty minutes later, he had gone a bit in the potty and all of his "one time toys" (small construction vehicles he used to get one at a time) had cheered, high fived, whooped and hollared.  Then we had to put a diaper on and rush to class with the promise that we could try undies after nap.  (We were definitely NOT ready for a 3 hour excursion sans diaper!)

We returned home just in time for nap when, (in)conveniently enough, he asked to potty again.  Thirty minutes later he had gone A LOT in the potty (and was late for nap).  Again there was cheering, promise of phone calls to Daddy and Aunt Cat, and undies after nap.  Again, we had to put a diaper on for nap time. Poor guy had been promised undies if he went in the potty and twice he had gone, and twice he had a diaper again.  Clearly we needed to modify our message a bit.

After nap, though, as promised, my big boy stepped into his (barely absorbent) training undies for the first time.  The we slipped on his shorts over his barely-existent bum and headed down for snack and outdoor play.  Ordinarily that time of day does not involve a lot of drinking, but, for some reason, LO was all about cups of water and milk over the next 2 hours drinking at least twice as much as usual. We ventured bravely from the front steps to the cul-de-sac and for 2 and a half hours LO kept those undies dry.  Finally I asked if he needed to use the potty and he bashfully nodded yes.

We headed inside, but on seeing the green potty (his preferred potty is the blue one, upstairs) he entered total meltdown.  I truly had no idea why, and therefore, no idea how to respond.  Was it a fit that needed time out? Fear of the green potty that needed a more tender approach? Had he gotten hurt and I missed it?  I tried to figure it out and was left with a fit as the only explanation.  I sent him to the closest time out spot and considered how crying was increasing pressure on his undoubtedly full little bladder.  He unfortunately went to a more distant time out spot and promptly released a small lake into the living room floor.  He stopped crying then long enough to tell me he had a leak, then burst into tears again.  I tried to comfort him while keeping him from slipping and tracking the mess all over the floor.  Then encouraged him to sit on the potty in case there was more.  The sobs continued as I bent over my 37 week belly and tried to breathe while I cleaned up the mess and consoled him.  What had been a touching and promising day suddenly felt like a total flop.  I asked him what he wanted to put on so we could eat dinner afraid he would not want the training undies given the trauma of his "leak."  To my surprise, he chose them again and I was able to praise him for keeping them dry until bath time.

All of that happened on a Wednesday.  I hope I've made it clear that NONE of this was planned.  LO just expressed interest, and I thought it best to roll with it and see where it went. I certainly would not have planned to start using the potty on a day before Nanny K would be here for two days and I would be away.  Still, that is the way it happened.  Thursday morning LO awoke and asked for undies.  Actually, he asked for shorts (boxers?), but I explained that a diaper or training undies must be worn under shorts and he eventually chose the blue undies. That is how, with great bravery, Nanny K hopped on the training wagon to see where it would go.  For her, there was one small "leak," but no melt downs and no potty time.  I think LO just waited until he had a diaper and then went.  Friday was similar, but no leak.  Both days, they had time at the park during which a diaper was needed and used.

This morning we were back at it again.  He chooses undies every time he is asked, but has not told me he needed to go again.  We headed out for errands and the park this morning, so he wore and wet his diaper, then had another fit when I encouraged him to sit on the green potty and try before nap time. This afternoon we have a choice between a play date in our friend's back yard or staying home to practice wearing our undies.  It's hard to pass up the rare play date when I know LO has such limited time before Newbie puts those on hold for a while.

So I officially have no idea what our training plans are.  I never would have chosen three weeks before Newbie's due date to start this, but hate to not take advantage of his interest.  If we have more struggles with the green potty over the next couple of days, I think we will just take a break.  I'm glad he's interested, but he may not be interested enough to make it work.  Nevermind the challenge of keeping him in undies when Newbie is making his debut.  Whether this is a successful first attempt or not, I could not let it go without mention. LO has made so many changes of late that are making him more of a big boy around here.  This one, undoubtedly, is the biggest though, and worthy of praise.

Good job trying buddy.  If we don't get it together this time, we will soon enough.